oh my gosh

wow this thing works! i've been trying like a flea-infested hugu madwoman for the past week hoping against hope that it would, miraculously, give me this screen. my prayers are answered! *turns face skywards and starts mumbling incoherent ancient prayers of thanks* haha.

i must say it's been a very exciting 2 weeks since i've managed to post a blog entry up here. *swipes gloomily at cobwebs across screen* so boring to read others' blogs and cannot blog my own - kind of like a coil of police tape around the lips, which, as all incessantly talkative RGS girls would have you know, is sheer purgatory. :) well! 2 major events happened: i got hospitalised (so what else is new) and i played truant! hoho. oh, yes. oh well, maybe not technically truant. you could call it a run in with the not-so-bright guard from the attila-the-hun clan. :D

well another abscess formed over the previous wound site, so this is my 6th operation under major anesthesia and totally unfunny, cos we all merrily thought this thingamajig is supposed to be completely cured, finis, zapped. so on wednesday when the suppurating wound exuded extremely unfragrant pus i was totally freaked.

me: oh my fuck. *jabs finger wildly at spreading pus on my clothes* oh my fuck where is the goddamn phone. *holds tummy and finds phone using other hand* hello? dad? i'm leaking pus!
dad: oh we're on the train. *lazy Southern drawl* be back in 2 hours.
me: 2 hours????!!!! i'm leaking pus!!!!!!

ya. you get the idea. anyway we went tootling off to mt e, whereby the doctor got me admitted to NUH, and i happily nursed my cheerily cultivating mound of pus until eveningtime where the surgeons converged at the operating table in my honour yet again. :) i'm keeping the hospitals in Singapore in business, really i am. They ought to present me with plaques of honourary contribution to their fiscal wealth. :D hoho.

anyway i hereby rate NUH the best hospital to get dumped into, cos the nurses are nice and the food even nicer. :) or maybe it was just a widespread curiosity about my absolutely wierd medical condition (not yet named) that set them all visiting my bedside at 20minute intervals enquiring after my level of pain. Which resided insidiously at the 6-8 range throughout the stay cos the dumb idiots refused to increase the dosage of the pain medication. so i was literally having a hands on course in marine crustacean defense position during those 5 days. haha! and as a sidenote, it's so wonderful to be allocated the isolation ward cos nobody snores at 4am in the morning just as you're ready to scream bloody hell at the next person who makes a noise. well much better than ttsh or mt e anyway. mt is is the living epitome of why luxury goods are not necessarily the best around. those rich angmohs don't know what they're missing out on by not choosing government hospitals. (esp NUH haha pretty nurses! pretty nurses! *puts on lascivacious face*hoho.)

but one noteworthy thing is that i encountered a terrorist nurse on my last night in NUH. By terrorist i don't mean the sarong-clad, scarf-donning, henna-ed and mascara-ed version of the saudi arabian nurse shouldering an AK-16. i mean the terrifying kind of terrorist. and i also don't mean the white, floatilicious kind that moans at irregular intervals. i mean the very dominatrix kind. see what i mean.

nurse: i heard you haven't *excreted* in 12 hours. go now or i'll have to restart your iv fluids.
me: *high pitch whine* but i don't have to go.
nurse: *arms at waist* you have to go. now.
me: *glares back* i don't WANT to go.
nurse: if you don't go i will tell the doctor to come and catheterise you.
me: *death-laser beam flashing at high frequency* DON'T THREATEN ME. and the doctor won't listen to you anyway.
nurse: i will tell the doctor to catheterise you. *insists this like 200 times*
me: oh what the fuck. *turns to face the wall and falls asleep amidst her monologue*

ya. haha so bloody caring. anyway thank her lucky stars i didn't catch her name (thanks to my severe myopia and inability to remember the simplest things) or else a fiery bloodshed will be fought in the Human Resources Room over my complaint letter. and did i tell you guys what terrific complaint letters i can write? Jerlyn's teacher nearly got sacked cos of my letter, and i didn't even know the person, haha. oh well. tough luck.

pambamnana declares without shame or conscience that i am a doe-eyed chiobu. if you find yourself decapitated and dismembered tomorrow, my dear pambam, do not curse me. haha. blame your own lack of eyes. :) generally i look like shit, though on better days i can resemble vomitus. only very very special occasions. :) remember that! *wags a remonstrative finger at pambam*

anyway i'm anemic from the multiple gashes on my tummy and according to the doctor i am currently carrying 2 very long scars. that makes me look somewhat like a multiple caesarean birth mother, though i must say, i haven't met my progeny yet. :) and bad news: i've got a new pocket of pus that somehow either didn't get drained during the operation, or else just formed. either way it's anticipated to burst garrulously soon, so ya. watch this space for updates. :) i'm training to be an oil rig. you know when those guys manning the drill hit an oil bank they go "hey, pot luck!". ya me, i'm trying to imitate them. though i don't know what i would consider to be bingo if decomposing necrotic adipose tissue is called pot luck. haha.

gotta go catch up on work! piles of it, man. so brilliant. i only missed 5 days, for fuck's sake! shit. *shoots string of colourful expletives at the innocent-looking pile of work in in-tray* haha. so impotent, eh?

oh ya and joel, thanks for lending me your stuff! though only the chem is useful cos for the hell of me i can't figure out what's written for the math. :D thanks loads though! *smiles*