thank God~and please be with us now

ah. what crap. can't the blogger people fix this darned wrong posting format? :P it's really quite a nuisance to see this totally distorted, fractured, a little tortured frame. not sure i can really write when i see formerly familiar settings twisted gruesomely :P
anyway. results are out... first year of medical school, concluded with A-, B, and B+. incredibly amazing if you ask me... keeping in mind that i was admitted with an acedemic score half of my counterparts' :D but honestly, i'd like to thank God for this. i couldn't possibly have done it... and i know He did it to tell me that i haven't been giving Him enough trust, faith and credit... and it's true! haha :D i'm not ashamed to tell anyone that i have been less than completely trusting in Him, even though He has never failed to be with me every time i ask for Him to. it's a human fallibility i guess. our faith is frail and our resolve is weak, because we trust in our physical capabilities more than something intangible and (sometimes) imperceptible. we need concrete evidence. we need to "see to believe"... and God knows. so that's why He, even though i can already imagine Him sighing heavily in heaven as He senses the portion of unyielding heart in me, is so determined to prove me wrong by bestowing results way, way, way beyond my expectations. He brings me back to the place when i first fell to my knees and confessed that He is my Saviour, time and again He fulfils me and grants me reprieve from my worries.
i cannot imagine not having Him in my life. and yet, as any blemished human will tell you, i turn complacent in times of prosperity.
oh God i can only pray that You will not deign to suffer upon me the trials that You brought upon those who refused You... that You will have mercy and guide me to You by means of gentle ways. i've just read dante's inferno... God's wrath is something i wouldn't want to mess around with :P
gotta drill into my head what Jesus said to Thomas, on the night He returned to His disciples: "because you have seen, you have believed; blessed are those who have not seen and yet believed." -- John 20:29
to my darling muamua... don't be discouraged. it's easy to feel disgruntled and let dispair overcome you, but i'll always pray for our Heavenly Father to be with you every step of the way even as you gear up for this final fight. you can and you will do it, and i believe that at the end of it all, you will rise up a stronger Christian, with a powerful testimony that will shatter many embittered and hardened hearts for God's glory. and i'll be with you any single moment you call for me to be there... even though i must say that my repertoire of knowledge is far from satisfactory. but i just want to be physically and emotionally there for you, a pillar and a pillow... and i want you to sms me whe u're down k? :D there're many others who love you as much and even more than i do, and we're all here to help you past this barrier. they'll let you tap on their brains and i'll be your inflatable soft toy! :D